An eye-catching headline can lead us to read even the most humdrum article, which is how I end up skimming through a South China Morning Post piece titled ‘Stop Groveling to Racially Inferior White Dogs Scum Right Now’. Columnist Yonden Lhatoo apparently specializes in writing provocative, edgy stuff about how Hong Kong gives Westerners privileged treatment, for which gullible readers shower him with praise or abuse, presumably along ethnic lines.
I would have thought that discrimination against certain groups in Hong Kong, like Southeast Asians and indeed people of Himalayan extraction, is at least as much of a problem. And let’s not get started on the spectrum of bigotry that restricts top positions in education, legal, financial and other government bureaus to people who are not simply Han Chinese but cretins. Anyway, his complaints sound a bit 1990s. White kids get picked 
for school sports teams, he reports, and – you saw this coming – gwailos get all the girls.
It’s all anecdotal, but assuming these things happen, the obvious next step is to ask why. We are told it is simply blind ‘worshiping’ of people with particular skin pigmentation.
The amazing thing: he’s right. A quick flick through the rest of the paper reveals numerous (well, two) examples of blatant and clearly unwarranted favouritism towards white people – in the form of page-space and publicity for views of dubious value.
First, jovial ex-bureaucrat Mike Rowse takes 500 words to say ‘I’m overweight but adjust’. In fairness, the item contains some amusing imagery – blubber rolling around in search of its toenails. But would a Mike Chan or a Mike Wong have been given these column inches to play with in this way? I think not.
Second, landlord Allen Zeman disagrees with Chief Executive CY Leung about some abstruse Chinese Communist Party terminology. At some drug-crazed gathering yesterday, CY said that Hong Kong ‘needs to know more about the 60 countries’ arrayed along the glorious Maritime, Silk, One Belt, One Road Blah-Blah Strategy Thing, and our city will do some sort of conducting and connecting. And Zeman leaps up wagging his finger in outrage (maybe) and proclaims that, on the contrary, China and only China is the Super-Connector.
Since China Daily has already acclaimed Hong Kong’s ‘unique role as a Super-Connector’, and CY himself said the same thing to Edi the Prime Minister of Albania just a couple of days ago, I think we can safely conclude that Zeman is talking piffle. Were he Allen Tsang or Allen Hui, the SCMP editors would cut his inanities out of the story in a second. But being the ramblings of a precious whitey, they appear.
I declare the weekend equally open for all.
You guys are one of the 60 countries, right?
(This poor guy – he comes all the way from Albania, and all he gets is ‘super-connector, rich pool of talent, please invest here’ hogwash. Just take him out for some noodles or something…)
Yonden Lhatoo…crazy name, crazy guy?
He is as edgy as a North Korean editorial.
The last seat on the bus is always next to him, surely.
A kind of Pravda Uncle Tom.
It’s not all fun and games today, chaps. Readers may not be aware that today sees the last installment of ‘Moving Forward’ in the SCMP. While not rising to the heights of Poman Lo’s profound meditations on those least fortunate, today’s article maintains the tradition of incisive social commentary, rhetorical grandeur, and spicy wit.
Who will bare the mantle now? Yondon, step forward!
And CY still doesn’t know where Albania is …along with the other 59 countries.
Is Albania a real country, or one of those made up ones? That electric blue nylon suit doesn’t fool me! I think we should be told before sending all our “talents” over there!
Well much as it pains me to say it, but Yonden’s sort of right.
I would say he’s a bit off the mark though — what seems to be at play, especially at the highest levels of government is a profound lack of confidence and pride in Hong Kong, manifesting as foreigner worship. I have noticed over the past few years that whenever the government wants to promote Hong Kong it is always by making Hong Kong imitate somewhere else — be it pretending to be Korea (Soho), Florida (Disney), New York (John Tsang’s food trucks).
It’s high time the government stopped being quite so deeply ashamed of actual Hong Kong culture like Dai Pai Dongs and hawker street-food, and realised that celebrating Hong Kong’s actual culture would be a much better tourist attraction than importing some artificial nonsense or turning bits into an ersatz Seoul, Tokyo, New York or whatever.
Furthermore, Yonder misses the nasty little home truth that it is impossible for Hong Kong to throw off its colonial shackles when said shackles have been tightening yearly under our new colonial communist overlords…
It’s not really white worship. It’s the equivalent of sprinkling gold leaf on top of cakes. Pointless, tasteless, nutritionally empty flaunting of status aimed at the easily impressed. Mr. Cassowary works in the educational-industrial complex, which is one of the worst places for white-guy tokenism. He’s had a few schools try to send him back for not being white. His agency boss used to have to try to impress schools with the fact that he’s fluent in French. Although this had absolutely no relevance to the teaching of English to little Jaydens and Chloes, it was seen as an acceptable form of substitute poshness. They’d have happily taken any random German backpacker who looked white, though.
That’s why when it comes to “top positions in education, legal, financial and other government bureaus”, jobs are restricted “to people who are not simply Han Chinese but cretins.” They’re not trying to impress average middle class Mr and Mrs. Chan. Although I will note that the requirement for cretinism seems to extend quite far down.
Outside the tiny whitey bashing world of the Pro China Morning Post this is really a non-issue Yonden. What happened to you? Did you apply to TVB and they turned you down and employed Tony Sabine who can only just bumble his way through 20 minutes of self-censored pap. There are bigger issues affecting Hong Kong than this but my guess is you’re not allowed to write them, which is a story in itself.
I hear that Yonden is a protégé of Michael Chugani. Now that would explain a thing or two.
Our glorious columnist should not be using the word cretin to describe the higher echelons of the HK civil service. It is an old fashioned term to describe children born with lack of oxygen resulting in brain damage and physical impairment.
Our present “leaders” are however generally expensively educated at leading institutions (save for CY who is a graduate of Bristol Poly) who simply by choice or affliction chose not to exercise whatever their birth circumstances and “education’ have given them but rather prefer to pander to power and thereby preserve their considerable financial etc privileges at no risk save for derision which their lack of sensibility does not even allow them to know exists.
How come my white skin is no barrier to ‘Delay no More’ and ‘F off back to your own country’ when I am protesting idling engines on our streets?
Admittedly most of the drivers only have the balls to wind down their window and mouth off as they are driving away.
Amazing load of guff in that press release, even by HK “government” standards.
What on earth can those “expanding” trade and economic exchanges be? I suppose that starting from a base of zero, which is probably close to the truth, they can do little else but expand.
The usual smegma about Honkers being an “international metropolis” when we all know that since 1997 it’s turned into no more than a tawdry, jumped-up village, and a declining one to boot. We can thank commies like CY for that.
“Super-connector”, “rich pool of talents”; pass me the sick bag. The only thing the HK education system churns out is a rich pool of shite, the more aromatic floaters in which get to join the Administrative Officer cadre of that grand guignol outfit, the so-called civil service.
“Albanian enterprises”! WTF? There aren’t any. The commies are just after Albania’s natural resources. The same goes for the other 58 countries in the cross-hairs of their exciting, visionary “One cup, two girls” strategy. King Zog must be turning in his grave.
Pardon the dyspepsia. I’ve been on the Augustiner brau.
Typical response from a HK white guy regarding the topic of white people getting preferential treatment:
1. write a sarcastic article
2. point to how non-whites are mistreated by the Chinese
3. bitch about how they are barred from top govt jobs (in your case you also throw in the complaint that even top legal and financial jobs, assuming from the private sector, are barred to whites, which is a bold-faced lie. And if you can’t get that top job in a primarily Chinese firm, it’s probably because your Chinese is at the level of “oh, how cute, the white guy is trying to speak Chinese)
C’mon, can you guys be more original in your rebuttals? Well I suppose I can’t blame you. If everybody wants to put me on a pedestal, who am I to complain?
Mr. Lhatoo is of Tibetan stock and, it would appear, is a convert to the cause of Greater China.
Yes, bring back the dai pai dong. An icon of Hong Kong street culture, its fare was always cheap, delicious and fun. Obviously not the sort of thing that tourists want to see.
“you saw this coming – gwailos get all the girls”
HE:
I marvel at how thrilled I felt
Having a girl so slim and svelte;
Her tiny nose and dainty chin,
Her amber eyes and golden skin.
I liked the way that, though she guided,
I always felt that I decided;
Her sense of purpose made me tough
When I wasn’t bold enough.
“Her household motions light and free”
Dazzled and delighted me:
At the wok, or with a broom
Masterful in every room.
And then, as Wordsworth never said,
Her household motions in our bed.
In middle age, she only cares
For beauty treatments, stocks and shares.
Her household motions fade away;
I belch the dinner I had today,
Fried rice from a takeaway.
And now with rueful pride I see
My forceful wife earns more than me.
SHE:
His mode was graceful, indirect;
He treated me with great respect.
I liked the feeling, rough and weird,
Rubbing my cheek against his beard.
First I liked him, then I knew
This man was for the future, too.
Such energy, and zest, and wit!
I never really doubted it.
I measured him with canny eyes:
This man would work, succeed, and rise.
In middle age, he gladly sank,
Satisfied, in the middle rank;
Lost his younger zeal and zest;
“I think I need a little rest.”
A cup of tea, a football score,
A crossword puzzle, nothing more.
Searching for a tactful term,
My husband is no longer … firm.
And now I see, with canny eyes,
I only got a booby prize.
Ah, I failed your moderation, Hemmers. First time ever.
Signs of the times, eh?
@Big Al – yes, it’s real. A small country sandwiched between Greece and the Balkan states, its main claim to fame is that it was the only European communist state under the sway of China when all the others were under the thumb of Russia. That and having once had a king called Zog (crazy name, crazy guy…)
@LRE and Laguna Lurker – surely celebrating Hong Kong’s unique culture is against the principle of “One Country”? Besides, the Link can’t make any profit out of street food, therefore promoting it would violate another sacred principle – that nothing can happen in Hong Kong unless the property tycoons get a cut of it.
Albanian Mafia, triads, Commie party bosses, there’s the link
White kids usually do get the team picks, if the teams are any good. That’s because Olympic Stadium has become a nexus of patronage and corruption, along the line of Donald the Duck Tsang’s “Build it and the governorship/CE position will come”. where Donald littered the NT with underused Baseball Pitches, Lawn Bowling, Gate Ball (yes there is such a thing). All of these fields were built in rigged bids by Hung Yi Crook/Sun Yee On related contractors in return for helping The Duck get in line to be CE.
All the rot in the sports system, where well connected idiots of the wealthy are put into offices of the various sports associations at Olympic stadium (to keep them from ruining the family business and to kick out some contracts to family) means that most government funding is not spent raising up athletes from within the middle and lower class families, leaving only a few areas for locals where government subvention for coaching & facilities isn’t critical, like road bike racing, wind surfing, to provide opportunities for local athletes.
Expat children usually come from wealthy families who can pay for the coaching and don’t see their children as a retirement/provident fund, and hence can allow them to pursue their non-remunerating sports.
One wonders if Monsieur le Latrine‘s orifice is going to get any bonus points for pointing in that toilet paper of a rag this failed system of political patronage can’t raise any “local” athletes, and has to import them from the PRC, even for that space minimal indoor sport Ping-Pong. His masters surely must be hoping most who read his tripe either don’t give a damn or are making money from the rot.